Now we know why RyanAir is so cheap! We flew into Paris Beauvais, which isn't even in Let's Go, and which seems to be used exclusively by cheapo airlines. A bus ticket into Paris cost 13E per person one way.
Our bus driver took more than an hour to get us to Porte Maillot (in Paris), partly because of a roadblock, but largely because Beauvais isn't anywhere near Paris. After three metro rides, we arrived at St. Georges, the stop for our hotel (Perfect Hotel). We didn't have the best map, but after asking a grocery-story stocker for directions, we finally arrived at the hotel. It was 12:30 at night.
As is our custom, we were drenched in sweat and parched with thirst. We got drinks from the vending machine (by the way, they sell beer in vending machines in Europe), took showers, and went to bed.
So far today we've been in Notre Dame and done the circuit of Ile de la Cite. Now we're sitting at a cafe by Pont Neuf, drinking beverages apparently worth their weight in gold (4E for 7Up, 4E for beer).